I don’t even need to say more, do I? You know exactly what I mean. They are TOUGH. Some more than others.
We had a particularly rough one this summer. Switching programs. Aged out of her last amazing group. And that was part of the problem. TOO amazing.
This wasn’t something you just blurt out. You need to do it right. Which included a car ride… stopped to meet a friend… to do something fun. Lots of positive distractions there. It also means that she is locked into her seatbelt with nothing to throw. Windows up. With age comes wisdom!
Me: “Kirsten, so you know how you’re graduating?” K: “Yeah.” Me (in my best -isn’t this great!- tone): “So in September you will be with a new school! Where you do fun things and have nice teachers just like in TRACE!” Kirsten’s reaction was immediate and strong: “NO NEW SCHOOL! TRACE!!!” Me: “But honey, it will be…” K: “No new school! No new school! Trace!!!” Times-ten.
Me (backpedaling faster than light) : “Of COURSE you are going to TRACE in September! What was I thinking?!! That’s crazy-talk!” Yeah… backed down. I’m a wimp like that! And that’s where we left it.
No sense in bringing it up again. She reminded ME that she would NOT be going to any new program. Kirsten: “TRACE in 2014, TRACE in 2022. TRACE in 2060.” Me: “Of course, Kirsten!” The girl meant business. What to do… what to do…
Her teachers had a brilliant plan. Just have her work exclusively with Bob every day. THEN she would be happy to move on! Not that Bob is a bad guy. He’s a favorite of the other students. But not Kirsten. Man aversion. Yep. That’s one aversion I am perfectly fine with.
That plan kind of fell through the cracks when they decided not to traumatize Bob in that way. Whateeever…
Came up with a new plan. DENIAL.
What?! That is TOO a plan! Okay, there was a little more to it. You see, her new program started in August, and her old program not until September.
So what if… what IF… I just told Kirsten that she was going to her new program in August and back to her old program in September? See what I did there? A half-truth! Oh, I am goooood.
Then *fingers crossed* she would fall in love with her new program and stop fighting the transition. Stop looking at me like that. It is NOT manipulating. Just playing the game…
So today was it. First day in her new program. Things started pretty well. Kirsten only hit me once in the morning and herself once during the day. All those changes and all that stress… that’s a success in my book!
I didn’t realize how much of a success until…
K: “Leanne in August and back to TRACE in September.” Me treading lightly… keep it cool… no pressure here… even tone… brace for the impact… : “you can go with Leanne in September too if you want.” K: “Leanne in August. And September. And October. And January. And in the summer.” Me: “Yes!!!”
Who said denial never gets you anywhere?!!
Your turn! How are transitions in your neck of the woods??!